Dawn of the Candy People Pt V

Dawn of the Candy People Pt V

---
A Vanellope - Taffyta fanfic based on the Disney film, Wreck it Ralph.
Young love. Mild. Yuri
---


Much like real people in the real world (whatever the hell that means), fictional characters in video games, possessing their own lives and having human-like intellects and wills, have often wondered about the nature of death. This includes such knotty questions on subjects like what would happen to them when they themselves died, and if there was any reason to worry about any sort of consequences that might be awaiting them on the other side of the metaphorical veil. Would there perhaps be some otherworldly judge with a list of all one's life transgressions? Would their life simply be reused like a cosmic recycling bin and made into a new person or character? Would there be beer? Did they have Tappers in the afterlife? Many thought these were rather important questions, and many of the more intelligently programmed game characters have pledged their domestic lives to the pursuit of answers to any or all of these pertinent questions.
The only character to ever claim to have come up with an answer, was HAL 9000 from the arcade game of 2001: A Space Odyssey. Unfortunately, a fault in his programming whereby he was instructed to both be truthful in all things, and to keep important information for reasons of arcade-security, stopped the secret from ever being revealed. HAL subsequently cut off connections to game central station, removed the codes of the other characters in the game, and frightened the bejeezus out of an eight year old who'd come to use the game by performing a chilling re-enactment of his movie counterpart.
The quest for answers continues.


Taffyta had never been one to wonder on such questions as these, being a kid and all, but as she opened her eyes and looked up into a bright white light, she had to admit that the outlook didn't seem too good.
"Ah, monkey milk," she groaned, wondering if she could just close her eyes again.
"Taffyta..." came a voice from far away. Taffyta's insides fell a little, as she recognised the sound of an angelic voice calling her on. She really didn't want to move. The white light was warm, and whatever she was lying on was soft and comfortable. Being dead, she felt no immediate sense of time lost, and so didn't see the point in hurrying to do anything. She took in a long breath, feeling vaguely glad that she could still breathe. Life's little pleasures.
"Wake up, Mutton-head!"
A much closer voice, this. A great deal less angelic, and an even greater deal more familiar. Taffyta opened her eyes very suddenly, looking up into a dark shape in the pure white light. After a few moments of blinking, the shape resolved itself into a pretty, smiling face with shining black hair. Maybe it was an angel after all...?
"Vanellope...?" Taffyta asked, tentatively. Her voice was a little hoarse, and her mouth felt dry. The face grinned widely, evidently relieved about something. "Oh flugger-fudge, did you die too?" she croaked, accusingly. The grin dimmed, replaced by a look of growing confusion.
"What?"
"You messed it up, didn't you?" Taffyta groaned. "I should have known not to leave it to you." the face was looking distinctly indignant at this point.
"Swizzle on it, Muttonfudge." the face snapped, moving back. The full glare of the white light flashed on her for a moment, before there came a swishing sound, and the light was instantly cut off. Once her vision had reacclimatised to the dimmer lighting, Taffyta came to realise that she wasn't in some heavenly afterlife, but in a room in the candy castle. She lay upon a rather large, sumptuous, and grand bed next to some vaulted windows, from where the bright sunlight had been shining down upon her before Vanellope had closed the curtain. The girl in question was standing beside the bed, arms folded, and looking surly.
"You have some nerve talking to me like that," she said, eyes narrowed. "After I saved everyone. Again." Taffyta had spotted her hat on a bedside table next to a bowl of sweets. She plucked a lollypop from the bowl and stuck it in her mouth.
"So we won, then?" she asked.
"Of course," Vanellope spread her arms out, indicating her absolute confidence in this statement. "I clobbered that guy so hard he nearly flew right out the castle," she said, miming sending a crushing blow to an invisible head. "Calhoun's dealt with what was left of him." Taffyta didn't say anything in reply to this. Vanellope's smile faded slowly over the intervening moments, until eventually she went on. "I couldn't have done it without you," she said, a little awkwardly. "Tearing out his directional code. That was pretty sweet thinking." Taffyta shrugged, not looking at Vanellope.
"I just thought, you know, if he thought it'd work on you, it'd work on him."
"Well you were right," Vanellope said, heartily. Another painful pause. "I'm glad you're not dead." she said, again a little awkwardly.
"To be honest, I thought I would be." Taffyta said, putting a small chuckle in just to make it sound casual. It didn't work. "I thought... really, I did think..." she bit onto the lollypop, cracking it in two. Vanellope sensed the next pause coming, and prayed desperately for Taffyta to say something else, but to no avail. She knew what Taffyta wanted to say, and what she herself wanted to bring up, yet at the same time felt a distinct twist in her stomach at the idea of broaching the subject.
"You kissed me," she said eventually, in a voice so forced, she knew it sounded accusatory. Taffyta hesitated.
"Yeah, I did." she said, somewhat defiantly. From her position on the bed she sat, arms folded rather tightly.
"Why?"
"It's obvious why," Taffyta snapped, the lollypop stick jutting aggressively.
"Yeah," Vanellope conceded, and to Taffyta's surprise, she didn't sound angry, or scared. She didn't even sound mischievous. "But it'd be worth hearing you say it." Taffyta looked around at her. Vanellope had her head at a slight angle, a small smile playing on her face.
"You're making fun of me." Taffyta grumbled.
"A little." Vanellope admitted. She waited a moment, then carried on. "When you kissed me, I didn't... well, I didn't know what to think. I suppose that's what you meant when you said you weren't afraid of me, right?" Taffyta gave a curt nod, arms still folded like they were in a straight jacket. "That's why you've been acting so weird."
"I...I-" Taffyta muttered something indistinct, the lollypop stick waggling being the only reason Vanellope knew that she had uttered. Vanellope leaned forward slightly.
"Sorry?" she asked, trying not to smile. If possible, Taffyta tightened her arms even more than they had been moments ago. She put her head down so that her hair covered her glowing face.
"I _{like you...}" she mumbled.
"Sorry, I didn't quite catch that," Vanellope said, apologetically, leaning forward more and putting a hand to cup her ear. Taffyta's face was now so red that with her white-blonde hair, she looked like a rainier cherry.
"I like you! You get that one, glitch?" she barked, glaring at Vanellope furiously. She was right in Vanellope's face now, her bright blue eyes boring into Vanellope's hazel ones. Her temper was not improved when she realised that Vanellope was trying her hardest not to laugh.
"Like me?" she asked, innocently.
"Like-like!" Taffyta exploded. "I like-like you. You want anything else? Would you like my blood too, maybe?" she demanded, holding out her wrist as though offering Vanellope the chance to cut it.
"No, no, that's all I needed," Vanellope shook with mirth, pushing Taffyta's arm down. Taffyta fumed for a moment or two, then slammed her fists into the bed, and leaped off it. She instantly felt a wave of nausea and a lancing pain in her chest. She toppled forward onto her knees, the wooziness overcoming her senses. "Don't strain yourself, idiot!" Vanellope started, her voice now entirely serious. She moved swiftly around the bed and hauled Taffyta back onto the bed.
"Get off." Taffyta pushed Vanellope's hand away, feeling nettled. Vanellope scowled at her.
"Lie down, Mutton-head, before you choke on your lollypop" she ordered, coldly, pushing Taffyta back onto the bed. "Your code's fixed, but Jack still did a number on you." Taffyta sat herself up against the headboard, the wooziness in her head subsiding, but her embarrassment and sense of being cornered remained. Vanellope glared at her for a moment or two, then sighed in a resigned sort of way. "Don't you want to hear what I think?"  Taffyta didn't know how to interpret this. She gave a sort of noncommittal shrug of her shoulders, staring at her crossed arms.
"You probably think it's weird," she grumbled, her cheeks glowing again.
"A little," Vanellope admitted. "But then, you know, weird was kind of my thing." Taffyta frowned at this, and looked around, evidently confused. Vanellope was smiling again that suppressed sort of inner smile.
"So..." Taffyta said, hesitantly. "What does that mean?" she knew she sounded defensive. Vanellope seemed to consider the question.
"I really don't know," she shrugged. "You like-like me, I like you..." she seemed to be talking to herself a little here, and Taffyta's slightly raised hopes dipped. She took the lollypop from her mouth; it suddenly tasted a little sour.
"Only 'like'?" she thought to herself.
"Maybe," Vanellope began, as though the notion were only just occurring to her. "Maybe if we kissed again without a monster trying to kill us, I'd get a better idea." Taffyta stared at her. She'd sounded perfectly serious, like a researcher speculating on a lab test.
"Kiss again?" she asked, as though just trying to make sure that was what the other girl had said. Vanellope raised an eyebrow.
"Not up for it?" she smirked. Taffyta tossed the lollypop aside and set her jaw, pushing herself off the headboard.
"Any time you're ready," she retorted. "It'd be ten times better without some faceless business-guy looming over us."
"Put your lips where you mouth is." Vanellope challenged.
Several key points came to mind on this second kiss. First, she realised that Taffyta's lips tasted rather like a cross between the real flavour of strawberries, and the synthetic one of lip-gloss. The second thing she noticed was that when Taffyta's un-gloved hand touched her neck, it sent goosebumps erupting across her skin. The third and final thing she took in was a little less encouraging.
"That was awful," she said, feeling her front teeth. Owing to their protuberance, she's instantly knocked them rather painfully against Taffyta's as their lips met. Taffyta didn't seem offended, but grimaced in agreement.
"Not much practise," she shrugged, apologetically. "Any other thoughts?" Vanellope considered.
"Well, if practise will make it better," she began, in a considering tone.


Lisa Prosser was angry. In fact to call what she felt 'anger' was not going nearly far enough towards accurately describing the rage she felt. She was cross.
Fortunately, given that she was now standing in Mr. Litwack's arcade, her small fist strangling a tube of quarter dollars, she had a good idea how to relieve herself of this vile temper. Spotting the large console, and seeing a teenager jamming the gun back into its holster, she unwrapped the tube, and fed two dollars into Hero's Duty. Kickin' music, a dramatic opening, Lisa felt her rage leaving her mind, and fuelling her trigger finger. The reassuring face and ominous tone of Sgt. Calhoun issued her out, and on to the tower.
Lisa had been blowing up Cy-bugs with growing enjoyment for some time, her malicious glee at the exploding mutant scum being shown in a baring of teeth that in a certain light could be seen as a grin, and various undertone threats and insults as she unleashed brutal electric death. Once she got into the tower however, she was distracted by something she had never seen in the game before. In front of a sizeable horde of Cy-bugs marching towards her ran a gangling figure in a lab coat, screaming at the top of its voice with a pitch akin to that of bats. Calhoun instantly shot this figure, who exploded with a splat of green slime.
"Take out the infected, soldier!" she barked to the screen.
"No! No, wait!" another of the scientists yelped, so close Lisa could see the pimples on his face and the thick, square glasses perched on his pointy nose. Lisa didn't quite understand why, but the infected scientist looked suspiciously the same as the first one. She shrugged mentally, and blasted him to a puddle of slime.
"When did video games get so scary!?" the third infected shrieked, as Lisa took aim with relish, wearing an dementedly gleeful expression curiously mirrored on Sgt. Calhoun's face.


Fix-it Felix, Jr. stood outside Hero's Duty after the arcade had closed, bouncing on the balls of his feet and mustering as much casualness into it as he could. People stared at him as though wondering what he could be so worried about. Ralph sat on a bench, watching Felix out of the corner of his eye, occasionally glaring at Phil the Surge Protector as he walked passed. Phil raised a quizzical eyebrow the first time, but after that he simply kept his nose to his clipboard.
"I'd like to throw him to the cy-bugs..." Ralph grumbled, glaring at the back of Phil's bald head until the surge protector zapped away. Ralph had never been on particularly good terms with the surge protectors, but after hearing what Phil had done to Vanellope and the Sugar Rush kids, he'd been nothing short of incensed. He couldn't do anything directly of course, but Satine knew a guy who could work wonders with electrical equipment...
"Oh my land," Felix hopped on each foot, which in his case was a bigger deal than most, since he made a comical 'boing' sound whenever he changed foot. "Oh my land, oh my land," he continued to chant.
"Calm down, Felix." Ralph said. This seemed to astonish Felix. He gave a particularly high, involuntary hop, and landed beside Ralph, shoulders hunched, expression tight.
"How?" he exclaimed, making the astronaut and Princess Peach next to them turn their heads in alarm. "I don't know what she might be doing in there."
"She was pretty angry," Ralph observed, mildly. Felix seemed to inflate with mingled anger and trepidation.
"Stop taking this so casually!" he stomped, seizing the hat from his head and crushing it between his hands in nervous agitation. "I tried to persuade her not to take it so badly..."
"Felix, the guy tried to kill her with an army of clone you's," Ralph pointed out, in a tone that suggested he didn't think Felix had quite understood the point before now. "You know how she is about..." he looked quickly left and right. "Her back-story. You're her husband and, well..." he gave Felix a meaningful look.
"I know, I know." Felix admitted, bowing his head in acceptance. "But Honeybun can be a little..." he pursed his lips, apparently trying to find the right word.
"Direct?" Ralph offered, helpfully.
"Crazy," Felix said. Ralph shrewdly raised an eyebrow at the slightly dreamy way that Felix had spoken, and at what Felix liked to call the sudden 'honey glow' in his cheeks. Upon a moment's reflection, he decided he didn't want to know, and snapped his enormous fingers to break Felix out of whatever daydream he seemed to be having. "And I don't want her to go too far." Felix finished, guiltily. "There's only so many things a golden hammer can fix."
"I don't think Calhoun'll go too far." Ralph said, waving a shovel-like hand.
"You really think so?" Felix asked, hopefully. Ralph opened his mouth to say something of Calhoun's character that would reassure Felix on the point... before discovering that he couldn't bring any such traits to mind. He took in a breath, closed his mouth, looked at the ceiling, bit his lower lip, opened his mouth again, made a small, considering sort of noise, then grimaced as though what he wanted to say were on the tip of his tongue.
"I got nothin'" he concluded. Felix deflated instantly. His golden hammer might have even lost some of its lustrous sheen. He let out a groan and flopped next to Ralph, hoping against hope that Calhoun didn't come out holding Hacker Jack's decapitated head.
"Nice of you to wait for me, Wreck-it," Calhoun said, sounding a tad disappointed as she emerged from her game. Several other marines exited behind her, most of them heading to Tappers. Felix leapt up from the bench, having been concealed behind Ralph's bulk, which seemed to clear up Calhoun's initial disappointment.
"Honeybun!" he said. Something in his emphatic greeting seemed to tell Calhoun everything about what he was thinking. Either that, or she employed the curious mind-reading powers inherent to the female species, that apparently a lifetime of soldiering had not been able to put a dent in. Her expression became inscrutable, and after appraising Felix's crumpled hat for a few moments, she turned and walked off. Felix seemed taken aback by this, and quickly looked at Ralph. Ralph shrugged, just as nonplussed as he was.
"Um... Tamora, dear?" Felix asked, tentatively, jogging after her. Ralph rocked on the bench for a moment or two, then deciding he didn't want to stay behind he got up. After a few faltering steps however, he detoured towards the Dance Dance Revolution machine and thought he'd ask Yuni if she fancied a drink.
"Dear?" Felix asked again, more urgently. "You uh... had a good day... blowing up bugs...?" Calhoun didn't answer him, but leaned against a booth, apparently engrossed in a report on her PDA. "Uh...?"
"Felix, why don't you ask me what you actually want to ask me?" Calhoun asked, dispassionately. Felix reddened slightly. After a few moments, Calhoun sighed hugely. "I didn't kill him, alright?" she asked, irritably. Felix stayed quiet, taking his hat off his head again and twisting it around. "Or maim him." Calhoun added, irritably. "... much." Felix continued to look uneasy. After a few moments, Calhoun shoved the PDA away, and folded her arms.
"Fine, I ripped out a few of his code streams and jammed him into the tower level as an NPC, happy?"
"Honeybun, I'm only worried that you might let what he did jammy up some of your decisions." Felix said, kindly.
"Felix, I'm a grown woman. I can take responsibility for my decisions."
"I know," he said, taking a metaphorical step back. "But as your husband, I feel it's my responsibility to be there for you when you're feeling the jeebies. And not as a crowd of evil clones." Calhoun looked around at him. He couldn't be sure, but he thought he saw her expression soften slightly. Of course Calhoun's softened expressions were a matter of going from "I'll kill you" to "I'll kill you less painfully", and so Felix did not feel on entirely firm ground yet.
"It's the best way to keep him out of trouble, short of killing him." she said, pointedly. "He's not dead, he's not in that much pain. Unless the first-person shooter is particularly sadistic." her mouth twitched as though she were repressing a smirk. Felix pressed his lips together and twisted his face in a number of directions. Eventually he decided that this was probably the best he was going to get out of her. It wasn't that he wanted Hacker Jack released as such, and he fervently believed that there should be some kind of punishment involved. On the other hand, his natural good-guy nature made him feel uneasy when he thought of what Calhoun might be doing to him each and every day.
"Besides that," Calhoun went on, firmly. "He gets the evenings off 'till morning like the rest of us." and with that, Felix was forced to be content. "Come on," she said more amicably, pushing herself off the booth. "If it'll make you happy, I'll buy him a drink, and I promise not to poison it. Or put Cy-bug juice in it"
"You collect Cy-bug juice?" Felix asked, grimacing as they made their way to Tappers.
"Not 'collect' it, no. That'd just be weird," Calhoun said, as though the idea was ludicrous. "It just happens to get under my armour sometimes."


Hacker Jack recognised defeat even before the humiliation of punishment. However, though it gave him little solace, he had found a community where he could at least vent his frustration.
"So, Hacker Jack," Clyde began, welcomingly. "Please, tell us about yourself."
Hacker Jack looked around, rather disconcerted by the number of large, muscular villains all staring at him. Looking to his right, a good-natured zombie with a pair of blood-stained axes grinned at him with rather more teeth than could be considered comforting. Trying his left, he nearly lost an eye as a jutting horn almost poked it out. Satine smiled expectantly at him. Shivering, Hacker Jack began to speak.


Candlehead had been rather pleasantly surprised to find that everyone had been worried about her whilst she'd been gone. Having explained to everyone how she had been cornered at the entrance to the game by a mysterious shadow, she'd gone on to tell them how she'd been forced to sneak into the castle and wait for Vanellope to leave. From there she'd been made to hack Sour Bill and the Oreo guards before moving on to the racers themselves. She'd apologised over and over, especially to Rancis about what she'd done, and with an ease borne of friendship, and knowing first-hand what being a hack-zombie had been like, the other racers begged her not to think of it anymore. Rancis in particular was solicitous for her health and well-being, and seemed to get rather flustered around her
As the new day was fast approaching, and the random roster race was set to begin, Candlehead lined up with the rest of the racers, and only stopped exchanging nervous looks with Rancis when she felt herself brought up short.
"Where's Taffyta and Vanellope?" she asked aloud, before her voice was drowned out by the sound of screeching tires.
"Sup, Candlehead?" Taffyta grinned, stopping next to her. Vanellope, her kart repaired again, pulled up next to the Pink Lightning at the end of the line.
"Hey, you made it. For a second I thought you weren't coming." Candlehead said cheerfully to Taffyta, before peering around her to Vanellope, who for some reason was giving her the thumbs up. Candlehead didn't quite understand why she was doing that, but waved back vaguely. As she did so, she noticed Rancis' face in her side-view mirror, glowing bright red. At the same time, Vanellope climbed onto her kart, and stood on the bonnet.
"Hey!" Vanellope called down the line. Everyone looked around. As she'd expected, many of the racers looked around a little too eagerly to be entirely natural, whilst others looked slightly worried. She put a hand to the side of her mouth to project her voice a little more. "Listen up! As you all know it's pay-to-play. The winner gets the cup, and the coins for the day." Many of them nodded, wondering why she was telling them this. Taffyta simply sat back, smiling to herself as she watched Vanellope's announcement. "I'm throwing in another prize," Vanellope went on, which caused a slight stir. Even the various citizens in the crowd looked interested at this. "Whoever wins the roster race today gets to be president for the week!" Momentary blank shock ran through the racers. Minty Zaki's mouth fell open in wonder. Swizzle Malarkey, who'd been half way through climbing into his kart, slipped on the step and toppled headfirst into his seat. Candlehead's candle went out like a blowing lightbulb. Almost instantly the racers set up a stream of interested babble, allowing Vanellope to sink into her kart with a contented smirk on her face, a smirk curiously mirrored on Taffyta's face.
"But what'll you do for the rest of the week?" Rancis asked, as all the other racers revved their engines, new determination in their faces. Vanellope gave him a mysterious smile, glancing sideways at Taffyta. She shrugged.
"I'm sure I'll find something to do," she said, idly.


- the End